Interview with Amanda, 18, White British, middle class, Roman Catholic. Women, Risk and AIDS Project, Manchester, 1989. Anonymised version including fieldnotes (Ref: MAG19)

This interview is part of the Women, Risk and Aids Project (1989-90) archive which was created as part of the Reanimating Data Project (2018-20).<br>Anonymised transcript of an interview with Amanda, eighteen, who is at college and works in a bar. She enjoys horse riding and looking after animals, and having a good social life with her friends (which she feels has negatively impacted her academic work). She now has a car, which has had a positive impact on her sense of independence. Amanda comes from a middle-class background, but has lots of friends from working-class backgrounds in poorer areas of Manchester as well as more 'pretentious' ones from college. Her boyfriend of four weeks lives in Hulme with his flatmate, and regularly engages in alcohol and drug use. She has had quite a lot of sexual partners, more than her girlfriends, but doesn't agree with one-night stands and these sexual experiences have typically involved those that she has been friends with for a while first. Amanda expresses her own feminist thinking around equality and sexual reputation and pleasure, though there is sometimes conflict between her way of thinking and expressing her sexual identity and wider social norms and gendered expectations among her peers that leads her to question this, as well as her need for validation. She first had sex when she was fifteen and a half, and drunk. It was a while after this before she had had sex while sober, and she feels her views on sex have changed since her first time. She has found it difficult to say 'no' within heterosexual sexual experiences, and does not want to be known as a 'prick tease'. Amanda doesn't remember much of her Sex Education at school, but learnt about AIDS through programmes on TV and pamphlets that came through the door. She was using condoms, but now relies on the pill as her main method of birth control and protection and would continue to use condoms with a new sexual partner. Her friend was using the rhythm method to track her 'safe days', but this failed and resulted in pregnancy and a miscarriage, so Amanda is much more conscious and careful now. Amanda had learnt about contraception at school, namely the cap and the coil. However, she feels using the cap would ruin the 'heat of the moment' within sexual encounters. In terms of AIDS protection, she has considered using condoms or the withdrawal method. She would feel ok to ask a sexual partner to use a condom to avoid pregnancy, but would not feel as comfortable to ask them in the contect of AIDS protection, as there is stigma around AIDS and promiscuity. She thought that those at highest risk of AIDS would be homosexuals and needle-users, but now recognises that this risk is not confined to specific groups within society.

本访谈属于女性、风险与艾滋病项目（Women, Risk and Aids Project，1989-1990）档案库的组成部分，该档案库是活化数据项目（Reanimating Data Project，2018-2020）的成果之一。本次内容为受访者阿曼达（Amanda）的匿名访谈转录稿，阿曼达现年18岁，在读大学且在酒吧兼职。她喜爱骑马与照料动物，热衷与好友共度社交时光——她坦言社交活动对学业产生了负面影响。如今她拥有了一辆汽车，这极大提升了她的独立感。阿曼达出身中产阶级家庭，但在曼彻斯特贫困区域结识了诸多工人阶级背景的友人，同时也在大学中结交了不少较为“浮夸”的同辈。她交往四周的男友与其室友一同居住在赫尔姆（Hulme），二人常有酗酒与吸食毒品的行为。她的性伴侣数量远超女性好友，但她并不认同一夜情观念，过往的性经历通常都发生在相处已久的朋友之间。阿曼达阐述了自己关于性别平等、性声誉与性愉悦的女性主义观点，但她的性身份认知与表达时常与同辈群体中的社会主流规范及性别期待产生冲突，这让她开始质疑自身的观念，同时她也渴望获得他人的认可。她首次发生性行为是在15岁半时，当时处于醉酒状态。此后过了一段时间她才拥有了清醒状态下的性行为，她认为自己对性的看法自初次体验后发生了显著改变。在异性性行为中，她难以开口拒绝对方，也不希望被贴上“挑逗者”的标签。阿曼达对学校阶段的性教育记忆模糊，但通过电视节目与入户派发的宣传册了解到了艾滋病相关知识。她曾坚持使用安全套，如今则以口服避孕药作为主要的避孕与防护手段，但在与新的性伴侣发生性行为时仍会使用安全套。她的朋友曾采用安全期法追踪“安全同房期”，但避孕失败并导致了怀孕与流产，因此阿曼达如今对避孕事宜更加谨慎上心。阿曼达在学校中学习过避孕知识，主要包括子宫帽与宫内节育器。但她认为使用子宫帽会破坏性行为中的“即时热度”。在艾滋病防护方面，她曾考虑过使用安全套或体外射精法。她可以坦然要求性伴侣使用安全套以避免意外怀孕，但在艾滋病防护的场景下却难以启齿，因为社会对艾滋病与滥交存在污名化认知。她曾认为艾滋病感染风险最高的群体是同性恋者与静脉注射吸毒者，但如今意识到该风险并不局限于社会中的特定群体。